Got caught in a quandary on Sunday while preaching the Gospel. I have always wanted our children to be present in our church service so that they learn how to worship and how to respect God, but I used some language that probably was a little hard for parents to explain why I used it. I am sure that these children are not allowed to use it around the house, so now they may be confused as to how I can use it from the pulpit. The choice of language was effective for making my point; however, I may have caused a little one to stumble (hoping that the millstone will not fit over my fat head). That is a quandary -- one that probably deserved some more prayer in advance.
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5 years ago
5 comments:
Hmmm....I have to admit, even I was caught a bit off-guard by your boldness and choice of words, even though your boldness in sharing the truth of the gospel is one of the things I respect about you the most. I struggled with this for a couple days, had discussions with a couple of my "cell-mates", and then I prayed for understanding. This morning,
like a brick to the forehead, God helped me to see exactly what He needed me to see last Sunday!
In a marriage that is surviving the pain of adultery, dishonesty,and mistrust- I tend to be judgemental and unforgiving at times. My heart towards my HUSBAND is softening, as he has asked forgiveness and has offered his life to God, but to those he had an affair with, my heart wants to stay cold and bitter. I find myself being resentful and judging THEM more often than I care to admit and the "slang" terms you used in the sermon Sunday have certainly been part of my own vocabulary in the midst of my anger and despair. I've always managed to justify judging them because they were "not like ME". I felt as if I was better than them because "I would never be a part of destroying someone's family"..."I wouldn't hurt THEM like they hurt me".
Had you softened your words, or sugar-coated them that day- your sermon probably wouldn't have caught my attention like it did (no offense!) and God's point would NOT have been hammered home as it needed to be. My heart towards those who have hurt me is definitely changing and that will be crucial to my healing and the forgivess I am to offer. While I thank God every day for carrying me through my circumstances, I still struggle with my own self-righteousness.
I know that there were some folks who were really disturbed by your choice of words but I think as humans, we tend to place standards on our pastors that far exceed the standards we place on ourselves. We can't stand in judgement of our clergy anymore than we can stand in judgement of that prostitute you spoke of or even of the girls who helped destroy my marriage.
At the same time, I can't help but think that may have been others in the congregation who have found themselves in similar situations as my own and can understand where you were going with this.
I think it's important to explain to our kids or others who questioned your motives that you were not using the terms out of disrespect towards the congregation, or to the woman in the story- but to help us realize how our sinful nature stands in the way of seeing that Christ's love is not only unconditional, but is offered to ALL of us.
I think I worried most about those who were first-time attenders or fairly new to the Bridge. They may not have gotten the same message and I believe you're right- a little more advanced prayer MAY have helped you find an equally effective way to make your point. BUT...having said that- I'm certain that you didn't just throw together a sermon without asking for God's direction. I know you better than that!
Thanks for all you do to further God's kingdom-
In Christ,
Angie Pratt
proud member of the Bridge
Angie,
That is a well thought out post -- full of insight and wisdom. What struck you is the reason that I could not find another word to use. Anything other than that expression and we would not have looked at our own "religious judgmentalism."
Here is my apology that I sent to one of our members:
"The Gospel is offensive enough; the messenger should not be. We have to be careful not to be hyper-critical which is in this coming Sunday's sermon (not in reaction to these comments; it has been in there for weeks), but sometimes criticism has validity. There was nothing offensive about the words hell or prostitute in Sunday's effort (see Ezekiel 16). However, it probably was difficult to explain to an 8 year old why the word slut was in the presentation. It crossed the line and for that I apologize. The intent was not to offend, but to provoke thoughts of our own critical spirit when we are guilty of something just as vile in God's eyes. However, a parent should not have to explain to a child why Tim would use a word that would not be allowed in their home.
Let's try and focus on the teaching -- the message that Christ has for us. I probably distracted from that with choice of words and I will be held to account for that."
Pastor Tim,
Thank you for keeping it real. I was raised in a pentecostal home where God's word(s) were selective in nature and words like, prostitute, whore, whoremonger, beheading, killing, breasts, etc, etc, etc, were never used, thus taking away God's Words. Yes strong in nature, but effective in results. I cannot sit under a church or pastor who is so spineless that he or she cannot or will not tell it like it is. I believe in truth and it's ability to make us strong in character. As an example "slut" is a modern day term for whore is it not? I find nothing wrong with it in reference to what you were teaching.
Thank you for being real, and please continue to present his word the way you do and the way it is given to you.
I appreciate you and the church body, they have made myself, son and daughter feel welcome, and yes the worship is AWESOME!!!
Thanks Believer for the motivating words. Please send me an e-mail at tim@thebridge-church.com and let me know who you are.
In Christ!
Tim -
The verbiage used was to illustrate a point and I don't see anything offensive about communicating truth. I have taken the last couple of weeks to think about this and mull it over in my heart and in my mind and can only come to one conclusion:
It made people uncomfortable because it forced them to look at their true self and not the superficial self we see on Sunday morning or in the market place.
The question for me remains is this: How many people missed the true point of needing to look inward because they were too busy looking outward and being critical?
Just for the file, I go home every Sunday and explain the sermon to my son. As he gets older this conversation with him on Sunday will become even more important for us to have. I don't think anyone would have to explain anymore from that sermon than they should be doing every Sunday from a 'typical' sermon. I have never been to a church where a young child would understand the abstract thinking required to get to the true heart of the gospel so explanation should be an every Sunday routine for anyone with young children.
You're doing a great job. I don't see any millstones laying around so I think you're safe. I would only offer this as something to think about for those reading the post: The Bible is very clear that the Spiritual Leader of the home and family is the father; not the preacher. If we are truly applying ourselves as men as the Spiritual Leader of our homes our children will learn what we teach them as a complete, coherent Gospel of Jesus Christ; not what the preacher said in one sermon on one Sunday.
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